Month: February 2011

orange you glad i am posting a weekend blog?

this is me having vodka and free MBA house basement snacks in the Tony Goldman space as a goodbye

this is me walking to a meeting at 10pm
who makes meetings at 10PM??
sheesh

had table for 1 for the first time… in years!
it feels weird
dont judge me!!!

jorge scott and i went to IKEA to buy some office chairs

favourite view

setting up our temporary office at 195 Chrystie while we set up our PERMANENT GALLERY!

adios muchacho

went to 18 wooster to prepare a package for Jeffrey which was a really fun blast from the past
huge white space, skylights, rushing to fill a last minute Jeffrey deadline with only vague instructions
horay!

there is apparently a secret drawer under the sink of my apartment that was very unpleasant to discover
i have now moved MOSTLY out of there and a BIT into my new place
its pretty exciting
i dont want to show you pictures until i have happy nice pictures to show

whee!
this is happy
i went to CANADADA to see DADARHEA

this piece literally smelled like puke
it was puked on
arghhhhh

arghhhh

i see michael williams and joe and harley

i see takeshi and a stretcher

i see freely

i see peter coffin!
it was kind of a super mega convention of cool artists and related people

i see london…

i see france!
yay the video started with butts giggling
i mean jiggling

whoever smelt it

this part was awesome
“art improvers”

hey jules dont worry billy fixed your painting

the video cut out before i could see how they fixed up rosson’s

color balance

so DADARHEA was conceived of by Jim Drain and Devin Flynn and grew to include tonssss of great artists including
Takeshi MUrata
Ara Peterson
Jessie Gold
Bec Stupak
Melissa Brown
Laura Grant
Francine Spiegel
Taylor McKimens
Erin Krause
Brian Belott
Debbie Tuch
Sam Borkson
Michael Williams
Marie Lorenz
Annie Pearlman
Joe Grillo

it started at OHWOW in miami
i actually wanted to travel it here and asked about it but never heard back

boo!
im glad it made it to new york regardless of course

i guess its fair because i technically dont have a gallery space for march but im still bummed

i really gotta get my shit together NOW

tppl Harley to dinner to thank him for helping me move
he brought this interesting artist Matt LeFevre did i spell that right?

we didnt eat you

or you
but just wait!

i feel flat as a flounder right now

yeah we will see

new apartment elevator is interesting

found some fun pat things cleaning out

what is that

checking out new space again

im sorry but

this is the best thing i’ve seen all day

yay!

nice coffee nearby

experimental ears

paul johnson’s space

pretty sweet

yay!

he is the guy who made Ben Jones’ doggie; awesome

view not too bad neither

lots of cool stuff up there

maybe see you back there very soon!

ok we are going to take a brief Rosson interlude because you guys love her and as a way to distract and potentially dissuade me from posting the additional angry butts i am longing to post. lets see how it goes:

love it already

forgetting anger and butts

what was i doing again?

Rosson went to Tokyo for her painting being printed in cool Comme De Garcons shop

traveling for art

yes, “as the men do”

the men travel for art very often

this traveling was done in that fashion

whee! weird things

things that look weird but are probably normal

i really want this to be marzipan

i really want there not to be studs on these dog pants

i read about this i think

mizuko kuyoh right??

just kidding
look how fun this must have been; i could shoot myself for not just going. my excuse was that i have to sign a lease on a new gallery, and here i am almost March 1 and hanging out with that bitch Wait-and-see

sorry to give you the grumpy peekin through so much serenity

serenity now

pretty awesome

i guess i will not subject you to any more butts
how about

makin soup?

nick says i have a soup problem

some addictions get worse in the winter

another cold morning looking at where i get to art

ack

someone arted in here!

speakin of:

this is goign to be awesome

somebody is being hobo in here

should i art here

should i art here

dude

we are too tall for this place

hmm

awesome
if we move here, this will be our official gallery motto!!!!!

this too
sound the larm larm!

came too soon, one warm day and now back to shit weather
one exciting day of maybe new gallery lease then another week of my old friend Waiting-to-hear

that dumb bitch

i want to wrest progress from her cold lame hands

i want to thrill her with achievement

[[ photo deleted 🙁 ]]
look its Matt Moravec
the funny things you find when movin’ out!

that was just one butt and clothed and you dont even know how baddie one shoe this post is about to get

starts of innocently enough with more ramen
can i eat this only forever? that would be fine for me

should i make art here? another LETS WAIT AND SEE

oh shit, already???

i was gonna post Rosson Tokyo photos here but i don’t think Rosson wants to be in the same post as:

i got really excited about this and it led to much more than i bargained for

more than you guys bargained for too, i bet

im sorry i should never post blogs mad, it makes them really offensive and scary and offputting and TMI and i know it
i just can’t help it im angry and i want to do visual violence to you, the innocent viewer

i apologize
look at me i am so gentle, nose buried in a sandwich, driving a commercial van
i cant really be someone who draws lips on butts and krams cigarettes in them

cupholder? ahem sub sandwich holder

i drove to DC to unload myself of a million banker boxes of books and old paintings

i found a new place to pee so to speak and i have to move their with finesse and speed

i can’t be weighed down by books and old art

its hard i know all i want in life is the most enormous library of awesomeneess, i am a book collector, i dont even know how it was possible but i did it

HONK HONK

yes yes
HONK HONK HONK
all the way to DC

i made it!

then i made dinner!

then i took this huge dump on my parents’ house

this is me driving back here
GAAWL next time im just gonna throw everythign in the GOWANUS

got back just in time for our party!

good bye tony goldman hole
for all the fun party photos, google ALIFE THE HOLE JAMIE XX i think it should be up

im currently working on a show called FACEMAKER for LA

photos of computer screens

never go out of style

vodka: ditto

goodbye greene street hole
goodbye little buttface

it’s true!!!!

do you feel how awesome things are changing right now

everyone has spring fever

Sun Foot kicked off the good vibes

surprise concert, we gave nobody any notice, sorry everyone!

olivia and i decided to go on an adventure afterwards

i gotta get out and be with people and the city

ive been in a hole way too long no pun intended

this is jeanne greenberg’s new space on the bowery literally on the left of the noo moo
LCD screen instead of glass rolldown gate! thats a new one

makes me want to hang out there

upton not ever being able to the fish made me REALLY wanna go there

upton not being able to go to lit made me really wanna go to lit

whee!

olivia kept fingering all my photos

this is the show we are at!

omg whats this

aurel sexy sexy time

always pee after sex
🙂

always get wasted after sex

party night #1 under my belt, feeling pretty awesome
what else

angry past barfing up happy future!

had tacos at this new place in nolita weird right? it was great

saw some more gallery spaces

should i art here

should i art here

should i art here

should i ride on the back of a motorcycle to a fun concert in brooklyn?

did i mention he was cute?

dan nadel and joshua white light show dude talking about
1968-1970 at the Phillmore book dan wrote for

whee!

then devin flynn gary (panter??) and this guy Ross played music

it was fun

had dinner with a canadian named Harley

not bad neither!

went to motorcycle dude’s place

of course he lives in some fantastic never see these spaces anymore bowery loft dream houses

and it has a big dog!

i love big dogs

so does harley

motorcycle dude said he kept this because it looked like his ex girlfriend
i said his ex girlfriend has nice tits

he wanted to take photos of me at the hole which is now the cock, as you all know im sure

scott was DJing

I P Freeley

i met lots of great new boyfriends

we watched a cluster of dudes around this turbaned fellow silently rubbing one anothers crotches in a little circle, quietly in the corner, no one saying a word, it was one of the weirder things i have seen in life

good morning meeting i almost slept through!

good mornign meeting snacks!

the future!
the future is upon us whether we are hungover or not

hi guys i really want you all to come to this so i am foisting this blog into the world half made up so i can get this invite out now

get over here!
for a mellow abstract evening

so what’s up we need to talk about this awesome thing

ALIFE has made a conceptual group show retail crossover automation

the opening was great

sold lots of items

the first one to go was CHEAP DATE WITH RYAN MCGINNESS

hope it goes well!

what i want out of the machine:
The Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black cologne!!!

Bec Stupak queefer dvd!!!

speaking of Kembra how hot is this:::

OMG!!!

oooo

favourite!!!

too hot

what else

did i post this baby shoe yet?
i gotta clean photobucket out one sec

ok

we got yer food photos

check

your investor meetings overlooking central park

check!

cool fashion week street photos

exhibition photos

ooo!
surreptitious museum photos are a must

Condo is pretty great, im glad everyone thinks so too

Benglis

Lynda with a Y

Y not!

Y, yes please!

more food photos

old hotel photos

not super old
but feel so old today!

valentines day alone and this hotel past seems so far away
was this real?

or just a weird fantasy

no we are at the BOX

that IS patti labelle

singin happy birthday
to stefan and arden’s friend

pretty amazing

life is so weird!!!!

ben jones mural
harbinger of fun

patrick painted this!

morning morning back to reality

still trying to find an apartment goddamit

should i pee here

should i pee here

should i plant a tree here

ah!
this is where i want to pee

awesome
i applied to pee here

now im making more soup for one
soup therapy

dramatic

ha ha not so glamorous at the end tho!
mushroom beef barley soup

more harsh e vil mornings

had meatloaf with abby and matt in their new place in park slope!

yum

man those dash photos last post made me mush

seeing sace everywhere….

you guys are so sassy

it IS a major divide; people who think office carpeting screwed to the wall is worth looking at and thinking about, and people who call bullshit

its not even about calling bullshit really tho, because everything can be art that is fine, its so boring to say X is art Y is not art, etc

its that there is nothing exciting to see or think about
it can be art, fine, sure, but it is worthless to me intellectually, emotionally, spiritually

it is no coincidence i am illustrating my point with these photos

most good artists i know refresh their brains with old masters and historical works of art
whenever they start accidentally thinking some carpet on the wall is awesome

guest blog!!
stefan bondell went to rome for his 30th bday and sent me some photos

remember New York Minute Rome?
that was such an experience

didnt get to see ANY of this cool stuff when i was there because of how much work there was to do

haha

teehee

whee!
i miss rome. i wish i could do another fun show there

a bit more expensive than the fresh drinking water free on the street above!

awesome

stefan and arden birthday night

so stefan is the guy you may have heard of from his big poetry readings
he sent me some photos of the last one! that i missed for some stupid reason and its awesome

oops not this

tee hee

no its this!
oh wait no that was the first one

there we go

poets and dont know it

got sense and don’t show it

beep bop boop

wow its renee ricard!

dashy was friends with him
he talked about him to me a lot, made him sound like this fascinating guy
which im sure he is

aw
its so nice stefan has these photos

here is fun video of terence being crazer!

back to kathy camera

im skipping a bit ahead to just show you what the bun did most recently at the Mary Boone

he made salty

oh tee tee

your knees must hurt

do not go gentle into that good night

ooOOOoo

you can compare this to the pile of sand with balls that i said was “barely art”

excited to hear what you think

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

still in LA and here for all you rosson fans is some rosson at long last

whee!
we are at the HAMMER museum opening

there was Cuoghi mini show

there was weird slanty perspective toom
makes me look tall, i am into it

the shelf is level with the ground. in person it is quite nauseating

the main opening was for “barely there art” which is a very annoying kind of art
they give you this leaf when you enter

barely art

barely able to get through this drivel
read it!
barely coherent

this lady was the only thing i liked a little

can you read that name? i cant in the thumbnail. but that is the artist

barely art

i can barely contain myself over how barely this is art!

ahahahahahaha seriously??
rosson and i had a lot of fun tearing this show a new butthole
we should have done the audio guide
barely a guide

and then!!!!
upon exiting the show there was a museum dude COLLECTING those fucking leaves with the fucking bullshit on them
the leaf that said NO ONE OWNS THIS ART blah blah, the guy was like PLEASE GIVE ME THAT BACK IT IS THE MUSEUMS

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHHA

its rosson
we are going to Jeffrey’s house

yay!!!!
now this is art: jeffrey got chris to reconfigure components from his 2002 whitney biennial staircase piece in his house!

dont worry i took photos of everything

fuckkkkkkk

this piece was never photographed in detail since 2002
until now!!!! art from behind exclusive!!!!

i hope you enjoyed it

i cant help but like figurative art best

i think that is normal

a neckface in a nook

kembra butts over the bed

elena accidental boob exposure

brits together: richard woods room redone for fountain

“woods”

then Chris’ band SUN FOOT played
they are gonna come play at the HOle this month actually!!!

then we went to coool justin and jonah meth lab guys’ house in L something…. Laurel Canyon

i dont know how party savvy you guys are to subtle details but this is an “all night party table” as opposed to a “everyone gone by 3am party table”

oh the morning

if the world didnt contain things like this i would not love the world

went to New Image to visit Marsea and check out the Cleon Peterson show

looks like they had an all night coke party too

pretty cool

i might have liked his weird abstract pieces better???

whee!

cool small things

cool small things

so whats up
this is us deinstalling the booth
i dont even have a photo of the booth
oh BROTHER

bye bye LA art fair!

this is my contribution to the barely art show

fuck it this whole place should be in the barely art show seriously!!!

no no this is too much
not bare enough

thats better
now we’re talking

i like that painting back there

yay this piece is excellent
very evocative
makes you consider what art really is, and what space is, and what steaming turds are

hahahahahah ok keep it positive keep it positive

this is some fancy sushi place suzanne and rosson picked out

beef carpaccio with tempura mush on top?

beats me. somethign tasty

dont talk to me about art any more i am done hearing it

i wanna hear about sushi and martinis and boys

airport margaritas

and fucking sitting in my bra size AGAIN on the way home!!

ohhhh back in the dark

back to the darkness

yum

one bright spot!

one cool car, remember i posted this a long time ago and someone told me what it was?

lookin at spaces on the bowery but really just wanting to rent this CAR for the gallery

hahahahha wow

who owns this i want this

who owns this i want this

ooo this ones ready to go

essentially my camera is just full of photos like this

and graffiti

so this guy eric yahker that i liked, this is the book his dealer gave me

TESTICLE
i love it

strange winter constructions

oh man

avery + big red cock

sigh!
lets not go there

lets hide in our purse instead

this gallery has a great view

this gallery sucks

now we’re talkin

this is where the child labor enters

elena behind bulletproof glass

still got a lot more to see though

the vending machine came

jorge had to get stitches

kathy had to get ramen

upton thinks he can take the place of rosson on the blog
we had a lovely date, just as friends, you know, girls out on the town

high + dry

hadnt eaten all day and then got to eat bubbling brazilian stew thing! so happy

so warmed and comforted

some graffiti vandals fucked up our van

some airplane vandals fucked up the sky

the melting snow revealed its treasures

im on the apartment hunt

do i want to cook here?

do i want to pee here?

im just going to go home and make poblano crab chowder for 1

any port in a storm

thursday!!!
did you guys get the email this morning????

its goign to be awesome

at the hospital yesterday
just hanging out for like 10 hours
eating lobster rolls in the ER

baddie one shoe had to stay here

while goodie two shoes got to go home and sleep in nice bed and make soup and watch hulu

i feel very anxious having one billion back photos to bury you in

i gotta just blow through these bear with me

La Art Fair at teh Barker Hanger in Santa Monica

checking out Royal T

they have a warholian

i see a rosson in there

there we go

this guy Eric Shiner who is nice curated it
totally into it

taking Taylor and Carola to Home Depot
glamorous

eating with Rosson at Stella somethign?

it tasted fantastic to see rosson again!

healing

vitamins

flying

palm trees

starting to hang just a wee bit

i could have sword this was a david shrigley
do you think olaf saw the same shrigley drawing i did?
do you think shrigley saw the same olaf scultpture we did?

this piece is cool too

and this

Al Moran with a very girlie dessert at the Chateau

oop oop booth is getting cool!

taylor is making booth cool

honor fraser booth is weird

cosmic butthole

of all the slacker minimalism that i hate and diss, i must admit i really like this

“art fairs’

“chris perez”

lean art

asshole art

asshOOOOLEEE

standard art

lets see what all the fuss is about

machine art? sidewalk art?

suzanne said first and then jeffrey said these were his favourite

this was my favourite
$50 in the DAP booth

yay!

i love this
New York Minute Rome!

never forget!

back at the fair
looks like something embarrassing is about to happen

look its jeff!

did you know jeff went to school with barry?

i liked this painting

i like drinking espresso martinis at Soho House

me and Elena i like this picture!

Ben and Christina took us to Matt Groening’s favourite Thai restaurant

yay!

its hard to visually represent spicyness but i think this photo might?

Rosson’s spicy necklace

awesome

ben’s show comes out soon on cartoon network!!!

i like this photo too

this is at Dirk Knibbe’s house
house parties
drunk driving

hanging out

jack please tattoo this on me
serious

less serious: jar jar’s show at honor fraser

hmmm

hmmm

jar jar make cone
jar jar tires!

tie tie

i like these actually ill stop making fun

meh

oh this show was fun for a ha ha

mild titillation

titty mildation

felchy

walking around culver city can u tell?
this is Bum + Poke
a Nigel COoke show

he has been really interested in exploring portraiture of spencer sweeney

look he made a dan colen

spencer’s feeling lopey

spencer angry GARRRRRRRR

omg just kidding dont listen to me im full of crap

flying crap

spencer forlorn

spencer make art HAHAHAHAHAHA

great show

ok on to the next
i really like this guy ERIC YAHNKER

buts

cans

kaleidoscope

fidel

feeling depressed?

have some pizza

awww remember when dash would cut out the basketballs, foodballs, etc and put buttholes instead?
dribbling buttholes
intercepted buttholes
home run buttholes

TITS O CLOCK

this show is great i love this show

i will stop for today
here in the Hammer parking lot

totally unforgivable to disappear for so long
i know i know
sometimes… sometimes life takes a shit on your head

No, or Many times?

we took this wee topography to LA
we are still in NYC you will see

at Abby’s house

Abby’s small bean inside her!

Abby’s preggy pillow
we gossipped is that how you spell it?

poo poo platter

yay!
…..BARF

not barf
yum

sad, on many levels

happy!

went to visit a sick friend
she has lots of flowers to keep her smiling

went to pick up Dearraindrop painting in their Kenny Scharf temp studio

that keeps them smiling!

whee!

whee!

smiles all around

neutral foods
last meal

rode to LA in my bra size
ewwww

how LA is this photo?

wait i have a few more new york ones and then tomorrow LA onslaught:

mystic graffiti

snow temples

harm reduction

stop snitching

no parking

hahahahahahaha!