urbanity

rurality
suburbanity
it’s early and my tote bag is dirty

this! more on this in a sec

festivus

rosson opens her show in Paris tonight!
i don’t know how we will get to see it
we will wait patiently for the internet to be updated with it

jeffrey kept trying to make her laugh so the picture would be better. he was very sure that the picture would be boring unless she was laughing in it. which is funny i guess!

rosson has moved into williamsburg deitch studios! she has marked her territory
not with pee

territory markus

i spit on this so rosson would not eat my salad at Diner

willie HAS peed all over her new back yard to mark it as his territory

guess what?
willie doubles as a hat

hold still stupid hat!

guess what? willie doubles as a vagina dentata

on that note i should probably go to DC

it was my dad’s birthday weekend
so union station was putting up all these big wreaths for him

suburbanity. these colors dont come in new york

tennis! if only i could play tennis in new york there would be literally no reason to ever leave

i made billy go play at night with me too
that’s how much tennis i wanted to play

nikki my only high school friend invited me over for champagne!
not quite as visually stunning as the pineapple upside down cake was on this table but still great
she taught my brother how to use Pandora

suburbanity

we bought my dad an orchid

my brother made breakfast that looked like his sweater

suburbanity
if i keep saying it it becomes a word

i bought my dad this yellow sweater kind of as a joke; in imperial china you didn’t get to wear yellow because it was the emperor’s color. until you turned 80 when you officially could. yay dad!

my mom made me print these out at Kinkos for her to cover the peeling paint and plaster patch on the wall

which pretty much sums up her perspective on art

just kiddding

old people party
the really old dude talking to my dad worked with him on nuclear weapons crap and helped take care of his first batch of kids from when he was in his 20s. in the 20s! just kidding. in the 40s i think

whenever my mom kisses my dad in public he pretends he doesnt like it and flails around and says “yuck!”

look at all this extended graysonism
absonism?
graysonism

suburbanity

ok ok ill stop

i got to go to the best PHO in DC again (which is in VA actually)

i got to go blacklight bowling

my mom seems to have taken a picture of me doing it

sighhhhhh
you have to picture this place also as being full of “bethesda singles” which are a unique brand of ick, and BLASTING literally shaking the seats Lady Gaga and then like Nickelback or i dont even know the right names for the kind of music my goodness and everything being black-light

oh and the huge TV screens everywhere
sighhhhhh

my mom freaked out because john (dad’s youngest of the first three sons young kid) wasnt around when the leaf thing snuffled up the leaves he had raked so she went out into the street to take a picture of it for him

“de gustibus non est disputandum”

if you were about to throw up from how ugly and banal suburbanity can be, try on this RURALITY!

if it doesnt soothe your soul down to your socks you might be short one soul

billy was the victim of a brutal seed dispersal

ahhhhhhhhhhh

ah environmentalist jokes

billy told me i was so lazy that i probably had EPIPHYTES do you get it?

is my brother not witty and suburbane?
look how rainy and slimy it was the whole rest of the time
no more tennis for kathy
no tennis and all family make kathy go…

i ate some muscular feet at my dad’s favourite seafood place, Crisfields

we played mini-golf at this bar in South East
a sort of scultor-manqué’s little shop of nightlife horror

it was DC themed
ah DC! fun-ish without a shred of cool. selfconscious and strivingly uncool. doomed, for me at least.
there is not one thing about DC that is effortless
is i guess how i would describe it

finally thanksgivin
GOB get me outta here!

i cant be around any more j crew necks

i know i know don’t be a butt
i love seeing my parents and silly brother and i love how funny the 80th birthday was
but i do not like suburbanitas or rusticus, to use the latin. i like the nine popes URBAN!

patrick painted that mural
that was why he got no thanksgiving this year
poor pat!
and look it has made him deranged
ür-banity

someone get that pup a tofurkey and i mean quick!

i’ll take this lot over a suburban forest any day